


Something Blue

by PawShapedHeart



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Child Loss, Clintasha - Freeform, Domestic Avengers, F/M, Feels, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-08
Updated: 2014-05-08
Packaged: 2018-01-23 23:25:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1583228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PawShapedHeart/pseuds/PawShapedHeart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Didn't they pay their debts back; wipe their ledgers clean? Why were they being punished after all the good they had done? It wasn't fair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Something Blue

**Author's Note:**

  * For [clintashashipper on Tumblr](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=clintashashipper+on+Tumblr).



> You have been warned: Trigger Child Loss

His hands shook as he folded the small blue fabric and placed it among the others in the box. He ran his hand over his face and looked up and around the small room. There wasn't much, they didn't have much time to plan but there was just enough pain decorating the room that he had to keep pushing himself forward and not break down and cry. He took a deep breath and reached for another outfit, this one purple with a small arrow iron-on plastered on the front. He squeezed the material tightly in his hand and held it to his face as he felt the hot tears begin to fall again. It wasn't fair.

Didn't they pay their debts back; wipe their ledgers clean? Why were they being punished after all the good they had done? With a shaky breath, he continued to fold the outfit and added it to the box with the others. His hands balled into fists as he reached for a small blue blanket, delicate white script hand embroidered in the corner with a name that was spoken with such excitement only weeks ago before life turned its evil eye on the couple of assassins who thought just once, just once they would have another option.

Clint’s calloused fingers brushed the satin trim of the blanket before he traced the letters TOBIAS, before gripping the fabric tightly in an instant and throwing it across the room. He had to hold the edge of the wooden crib to prevent him from falling to the floor. He heard soft footsteps behind him and he wiped his face with the back of his hand before the door to the room opened slowly and a tall, slender shadow cast into the room from the hallway.

_“Clint?”_

Natasha was standing there in one of his old tee shirts, her hair disheveled, and eyes red and sunken from unknown hours spent silently crying in the dark.

_“You should be resting Nat, please go lie down.”_

_“I've been lying down, but the bed is cold. Please come back to bed with me.”_

_“I… I will I just…I want to take care of this….”_

_“Clint, it can wait, we don’t have to do this now-“_

_“I do. I need to… I need…”_

He felt his body begin to shake, as he gripped the wooden railing, his knuckles turning white. He stared at his hands, rough from the years of pulling a bow string to end life after life; yet at the same time he was prepared to hold the most delicate form of life if only he was given the chance. A small hand covered his gently and he looked up to face her.

She looked so tired, more so then he had ever seen before. Her emerald eyes were sad and dull, the playful shine now gone. They stared at each other for a moment in silence before she reached forward and wiped a tear away with her thumb.

_“Clint, please. Don’t do this alone.”_

His hand cupped over her’s where it rested on his cheek and he wrapped his fingers around her’s. He looked into her eyes which once held hope for something that was now nothing but a distant memory. He fully turned his body to face her and wrapped his arms around her now hauntingly slender frame and pulled her close, pressing his face into her hair and holding her tightly.

They stayed like that, just holding each other in the haunted room of a future they would never have; the soft blue of the walls a color more haunting then red and the little teddy bear in the corner of the small bed more threatening than a gun. A fleeting moment hung over them and weighed down their hearts, a joyous moment lost in sorrow. They would never get that moment back, a chance to hold what was taken from them too soon, but together they can rebuild what was left of their lives and that was all that mattered at that moment.

Before long, the box of tiny clothes, soft toys and warm blankets lay forgotten on the floor in a room they locked up and forgot about slowly over the years. Posters and maps covered the door and surrounding walls and a table holding a variety of arrow pieces and tools sat blocking the entrance until visitors would actually have to stare before they would realize it was actually a door and not just another wall. But no one talked about what lay forgotten in that room and it just became part of the background, like the memories that lay behind the door became part of the structure that made the assassins stronger.

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for clintashashipper's birthday one-shot fan fiction contest in April 2014. I'm happy to say I won first place which is AWESOME because I never win anything, and never felt my writing was ever good enough. My first place victory came just at the right time as both a graduation gift to me and something happy when I truly needed it.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it! This is only my second Marvel fan fiction and I hope I wrote the characters OK. Sometimes my headcanons overpower canon and cause OOC but I've been told this was OK, so I hope it is. I don't have beta readers so forgive any grammar or spelling errors.


End file.
